“If you don’t fuck me, I’m going to implode,” said my girlfriend to me over the weekend.
It had been yet another week of working late, late nights, being super-exhausted, just missing each other at home, etc.
“OK,” I responded, “take your clothes right now, unless you want to have some foreplay for something.” She jumped outta her clothes immediately and indeed I fucked her. She screamed, coming very hard once—and then again, softer. “Now I can concentrate on my work, she smiled—and I won’t implode!”
We lolled in bed and talked a bit. “Isn’t is great to have a girlfriend you can have sex with,” she said. “As opposed to…having to go out to find a lay whenever you want or need it?” I responded to her, laughing. “Well, yeah, it’s not very easy to get laid in the lesbian community, most lesbos won’t have casual sex–and some wont have sex at all” she intoned, a hint of exasperation in her voice. She had spent the prior decade or so with futile online and offline dating. The coffee meetings that didn’t lead to dates, the dates that went nowhere and the repeat dates that rarely led to sex.
I had a different experience when I was single, some of which I chronicled in the first incarnation of this blog. There is sex to be had with other lesbians, but there seem to be only a limited number of scenarios where you can, in fact, “get” it.
One is with women in open relationships who are only looking for play partners on a temporary or even one night basis. This is good for a hot one night encounter that will be just that—a one night stand. Then there are younger gals who are playful and talk a lot about sex, and will indeed engage in casual sex, but they are so damn young! And, after a short while there is nothing to say or do together and even the acrobatic sex gets a bit done, too! There are the respectable, age-appropriate women who want to go out on dates and have proper dinners and polite conversation and then have sex, but after they “put out”, they want to own your very soul—or get gay-married.
Neither of us, my girl or I, want to own each other or be gay-married, but we do want a a big helping of sex with our commitment. I know I am a proselytizer about having sex and making sure to take the time, make the time to “keep sex alive” as relationship self-helpers and quasi-experts always say. And tough I might not endorse or like the way others explain, teach or exhort us all to keep the spark alive, I do agree the “spark” is extremely important.
Not having sex just keeps one in the rut of not having sex. Fucking regularly, on the other hand. keep fucking fun and desire alive. And sex also keeps us all from imploding!