At the age of 5 I was placed in foster care, I moved from home to home never understanding where I was going or what was happening, the same can be said for my sexuality.
I remember feeling attracted to the same sex my whole life. I came out to a straight male who happened to be the son of a preacher at my local church, the word soon spread partly due to my involvement with the church and its stance on homosexuality but also because my life at a young age 13-14 was governed by shift workers and professionals who acted as my guardians.
I felt like I had no-one to care for me, people were time and again moving in and out of my life and to this day I never know who to trust or who I can rely on. So not only did a large portion of my church know, my ‘guardians’ and professionals such as counsellors now had new material to poke and prod at me about.
It sure was a shame that the people I thought I could trust such as a preachers son and caregivers were now finding fault with me coming out as a gay male. I was never the most secretive with my sexual nature and in defiance I resorted to more outrageous means of expressing ‘I don’t care what you think’.
Fortunately for me I had a safety net, my family. I have 10 siblings, all separated and my mother who I’m estranged from. But surprisingly once news spread of my sexuality ‘that being gay’ they were more then supportive, my own mother had told me many times that she couldn’t wait for grandchildren, I dreaded the moment I came out to her, she wrapped her arms around me and said its ok if you are.
It was the kindest gesture I had/have ever seen from her. My siblings many of them unaware of sexuality ‘due to their young age’ weren’t aware of what I was going through, but for those who did, they embraced it and I have to say, one of the greatest aspects of having older sisters is the ability to talk boys and fashion!
I want to finish lastly by saying, that two of my younger siblings, of which I’ve had vague time to get to know, I feel grateful for, at a young age they were adopted by a wonderful couple who just so happened to be lesbian themselves.
Over the years the couple embraced me and encouraged me on my journey as a gay male. I am forever grateful because this couple have given my siblings the best life possible, not only are they great people but they represent the LGBTI community to the utmost extent.
From R JORDAN