I have a set criteria for women I would want to date and I don’t think I will meet anyone who fits my standards
Dear. Dr. Frankie:
I really want to attend one of your speed dating events, but I have a set criteria for women I would want to date. I don’t think I will meet anyone who fits into my standards, thus wasting my time. What type of women attend your events?
Ms. Picky
Dear Ms. Picky:
One of the best parts about speed dating is you never know who you are going to meet!
The one thing you do know, is that the women you are going to meet are local, single and want to date. The second best thing is, if the woman you are talking to is not a good fit, you’ll only be talking to her for 5 minutes, so simply make the most of it and move on.
Now, per your 'criteria', as any match maker will tell you, the first step to finding your mate is to toss out your 50-point inspection list. You aren’t buying a car, you are looking for someone who is compatible with you.
Next step, is to narrow your list of criteria to three absolute “deal breakers.”
For example, a deal breaker could include:
*Not wanting to date a smoker
*Not wanting to date someone not as sporty as you
*Not wanting to date someone not financially stable.
Whatever your three absolute deal breakers are, once you define them, you’ll have a reasonable set of expectations, framing how you will seek out someone.
It’s human nature to want to focus on the aesthetic components of our lives, including our potential love interests. However, it’s important to be realistic with your expectations. Do not sell yourself short by only looking at aesthetics. Some of the best matches that emerge from speed dating are due to both women re-evaluating what is important when seeking out a potential partner.
For tips on creating your dating deal breaker list, try these resources:
Huffington Post: The 7 Dating Deal Breakers You Should Never Ignore
http://huff.to/1kExJHQ
Psychology Today: The Pros and Cons of Dating Deal Breakers
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/maybe-its-just-me/201405/the-pros-and-cons-dating-deal-breakers